Thursday, December 31, 2009

wohooo..todae is e last dae of 2009!!!

sruck midnyte,its 01 JAN 2010!!!!!

it seem tyme do flies..a year has alr reaching its end..all e events,unhappiness,sadness,happiness all dat will b cherished n remembered..
dis cuming year is a brand new year wherby me n my frens will be separated..we r no longer b part of hyss.. :(...
i will mis e tymes we r together 4 e 5 yrs..we only mit agaen on e results dae..

i will mis e hardship we spend together..:(..
there will b noone 4 me to feel iritated wif or bicker wif..hehehe..all of those will b kept s memories..


*wishes*

1.i hope i will gain hapines n new frendships at new school n werkplace.
2.if i were to find dat sum1,let us b frens who can joke ard wif 1 n other,who is carefree n is a honest chap.
3.i want to make more $$ to hlp my family income
4.i wanna fufill wt i cnt dis yr to feel relieved.

ryte now i muz build strong inner mental strength n phsyical stength so dat i cn stay alive..c'mon gal!!! u cn do it kaez..

i wish every1 a brand happy new year ahead..may it bcum more fruitful to u..
*aja aja* *hwaiting*

~hearts & kisses~
eeQa

Labels: new life

Wednesday, December 30, 2009

e dae dat i 1st saw u,
is e dae dat change my life.
e daes dat i cntct u,
r e daes dat u open my heart.
e tyme spend noein each other,
is e tyme dat makes me yearn 4 u.
bt now,everyting changed..

u were nt lyke b4..
eventhough u provide me reasons 4 ur absence,i noe its white lies..
im nt being emo here..

bt at tymes i really do wanna understand u,try to pujuk my heart to accept ur reasons..bt haf u ever once,consider my feelings?
i try nt to b paranoid n unreasonable..u left me being confused..
i feel sumtin is amiss nowadaes..i dun feel e warm,e love,e carre.. i dunno..
wt haf i done to deserve dis?well i realli appreciate 4 givin me encouragement wen im down n spurred me during xams..
is it ryte 4 me to sae : since u noe im faithful,u tend to test my patience n had me on..
r u tryin to test how deep is my feelings 4 u or how strong my feelings r 4 u?

well if u R ,u win..i alr begin to giv up..i cnt stand ur avoidence..my patience is slowly deteorating..thx to u..i may encounter another setback..

im juz puzzled,y muz i deserve dis..y ,u who i trust e most,did dis..

if ur intention is to make me fall,i hope u will live happily..
i dunno whther u will get another person who realli patient wif u..

i alwaez regard u s a bro,lover n bestfren..i do hope u realize dat i only haf a pure heart which gif love to her 1 n only man..u noe im true..

~heart & kisses~
eeQa

Labels: fall

Tuesday, December 29, 2009

todae..i laze ard at hm..haf rest b4 start werkin..
went to take jab yesterdae n went to werk place to gif e tings required..

life begin to turn normal..a lilitle at tyme..event now s i was typin,i feel bored n lonely..there's no one here wit m..darlz also bz..cnt mit up..n im really scared of a quiz dat i took frm fb literally cum true..'BREAKUP'...
hope dats nt true..now juz haf to bear ..currently bat is runnin low..will continue tmrw..

nyte..

~hearts & kisses~
eeQa

Labels: recovery

Sunday, December 27, 2009

todae is second dae after chomel's death..e moments really is different..everywhere i go,cnfrm will make me remind of her..

its juz worsen s how m i gona face thoughest daes w/o u..who gonna make me laugh wen im down..who im gonna play wif once i reach hm frm sch or werk..now i dun haf any reason to kip me feelin eager to go hm frm anywhere..

still remember e tyme wen after i got u..i cnt wait to get hm fast in order to play wif u..early in e morn i will cum late s play wif u too..until my frens all take no notice..haha..

yea..its juz different..mayb others will tink,'oh,its juz a cat..u cn alwaez get another 1..' bt if ur an animal lover,u wnt lyke treat it juz s an animal..u will treat it s part of u.

.the next dae i plan to go out alone.i juz listen to mp3 in e train n msg nana..at 1st shes outside..den wen i was at cityhall,she saed shes at hm alr..kae la..den plan plan plan ,go cityhall..walk2..

we windowshop,den out of sudden,theres 3 guys,i malay,chinese e other i tink is a mixed..stalk us n askin 4 our numb..we were lyke'...HAHAHAHAHAHA'..in our hearts..

shessh..its was really funny..frm our actions dey do noe dat we both r att bt still sae' nehmind la..we can still b frens wt..' at last me n nana go in to 1 of e shop to avoid dem..

we dun mean anytink ..even if we r nt att,we wud nt gif our numbs lyke dat..dats nt e way to woo opp sex ya..

it was ard 815 alr,n nana pelawa me go to her hz..her parents ask her to bring me to her hz earlier bt we go cityhall 1st..haha..i play wit lolok n puteh..very funny..lolok was lyke seducin me with his sniffin my legs,gesel2 at my legs n foot..i also becum high 4 a while..haha..lol..

hes face is similar to chomel..only wen i was playin wif puteh..i accidentally called hym chomel..my heart skip a beat n tears auto fall...haish..i guess i haf to b strong on my own ryte now..bt wtd..shes lyke a sis to me..very close..

i juz hope i cn get over it n take care of another cat..a siamese cat..sama lyke chomel..

~hearts & kisses~
eeQa

Labels: fall

Friday, December 25, 2009

every living ting will surely undergo dis path called 'DEATH'.
dis morn incident realli makes my heart shatters n it cnt b fixed within a short period of tyme.i realli am feel lost ryte now..e sight of u layin motionlesly at e groundfloor realli makes me out of mind.

here's my tribute to u..















chomel,my beloved cat,i wish u peace n happiness.ur journey has ended todae.im very sowie if u slipped due to my carelessness or wt..bt i realli mish u..its lyke onli yesterdae i taske care of u bt todae..ur gone..

its hard to imagine dat ur gone..now dat ur gone,who is gonna b my fren..wen im stress n unhappy,whos gona b there wit wilful acts to make me happy agaen??..ugh..dis is so hard..

~heart & kisses~
eeQa

Labels: fall

23 dec 2009..e date dat i juz started to werk..eventhough its a small pay n tiring, im blessed to haf dis job..i get a job in f&b line,common s'pore's fav eating place,macdonalds..hehex

it caught me by suprised..i tink i wrote it in my previous post abt how it started..well at 1st i was scared of e acceptance of new member in dat mac..i was e only malay employee wit all chinese crews..e manager in charge was a malay 2.during doin e job, i cnt hlp bt feel a lil helpless ..i was alone..n kinda stress too..bt no matter wt i've to strive on..i noe e pay is kinda small..bt at least i get paid n cn gif my mum a lil..

i've to get my injection real fast s to start werk agaen on mon..dis sat morn im goin poly n get my injection done b4 goin sumwhere..sun i nid to rest n mon i strat werk agaen..:).. fellow crews ..plish b easy on me..show me e way n plish dun b harsh..thx..

i miss darlz..cnt wait to mit hym soon..:)..sumtymes i wonder haf u written a bk on mindreading b4..sumtymes u realli make my blood go upsatirs wen ur 'biscuit' behaviour shows up randomly..r u plannin to get rid of me fast b y dis way..by makin me haf high blood pressure??..

last bt nt least.. wanna wish all my frens n ppl out thre, "MERRY CHRISTMAS,SANTA IS CUMIN..TONIGHT.."..WOOHHOOO


~hearts & kisses~
eeQa

Labels: tired

Tuesday, December 22, 2009

its been a while since we contacted..wenever im alone or c ur fb or friendster,i feel guilty of myself..

im nt e person who emo bt sumtymes i really feel bad n dun wish to remember any of e past..its alr been 3 yrs..in my life dats e 1st tyme i've hurt sum1's feeling..in total i've hurt 2 person..first of all to Boii,im sorry 4 e mistake dat i've done..i shudn't haf make dat decision..im really sorry.ryte now wt im feeling is mayb e feeling dat u felt wen i make dat shit decision.ryte now i feel dat its my turn to feel e agony. well wt cn i sae,tings turned out dis way..im juz hopin dat ur fine n live ur life happily..i still remeber ur last sentence'u btl wan it?'..wt cn i do to stop tinkin of u.i hope u wud forgive my mistake dat i made 3 yrs ago..i hope to mit u agaen s to giv wt u own,e keychain..i still safekeep it for u..mayb u had it thrown away bt i cnt bear to throw it away cz its urs..n im gonna ..return it to u personally 1 dae..
its tyme to giv u bck..

wt i feel now is guilt,sad,disappointment..i really regret it...i regret cz i didnt treasure u..u giv me love,i didnt c it..how cn i ever clear of dis feeling?tell me Boii..ryte now im att, n i really scared history will repeat.. dis tyme i really treasure Darlz n i hope its true..

nowadaes he kip M.I.A n didnt reply to my mails..i scared.i scared to sms hym cz i fear dat his mum usin his numb..pls cntct me..u saed to sms me once u bought a new fn last sat..bt no news frm u..

haish..matters of heart really stressful..hlp me..
i dun wan to b trapped in e past..

~hearts & kisses~
eeQa

Labels: replaced

..todae is a lucky dae....finally i hav a werk..
didnt really xpected e mac manager to kol me aft a while..i thought i wudnt get a job thr bt yea..i get it..

tmrw is my 1st dae of strt werk n im very nervous..i noe e pay 4 fast food restaurants is a little lower compared to star bucks n etc bt nehmind as long s i get pay n cn gif my mmum,im satisfied..

now i wanna go slip n refreshed b4 start werk todae..dis is really funny s dis prediction cum true..in e evening i chatted wit insy regarding intro me to bricks,bt den out of nowhere mac name came out..n aft dat e manager kol..wah..is dis koled luck or what..haha..

~heart & kisses~
eeQa

Labels: double happiness

Friday, December 18, 2009

yeaaaa...todae is e dae..18 dec 1992 is e dae i was born..n after 17 yrs ,it had 1 more speciality attached to it..it is maal hijrah..a new yr 4 e muslims..:)..


these are e pressies i received..



e square present comprising of knowledgeable book of 3 series..hehe..it is a gift frm cik marsiah n amiera..thx guys..









NExt one is frm my loveable cuzz..its a carebear..wen i 1st got this i wass really really really amazed n touched bcoz i didnt really aspect to get a carebear for my pressie..i was only hopin i get 1 bt didnt realy expect to literally haf it..haha..thx sis..n it cums wit a speaker too..its really magical..







thx guys 4 e lovely pressie..jus comback frm outing wit nana..initially it was me n fiz bt sum tings happen along e way n he cnt be reached..its sad la cz e promise cnt be kept .. thx nana 4 spendin e dae wit me in his place..n haf fun eating e cake too..haha...i had fun us going to e sports shops at vivo lookin at e shoes n sports attire..smpaikan maen hide n seek eh ..mentang2la kau kecik,menyelit je kau nie..hehe..thx pal..love u..hehe

all in all thx 4 makin dis dae a special 1..n i want to watch ss501..bye..


~hearts & kisses~
eeQa

Labels: double happiness

Monday, December 7, 2009

haiyaa..finally get to blog agaen..been so busy.. last tyme during O also bz..now AFTER also bz..

bz finding job ler..recently had a chat wit mum..my heart was lyke crying inside,keeping cool for s long s i cn n try very hard nt to show her my 'soft' side..i juz feel lyke im hopless cz nt doin anyting to hlp her since now i've e tyme..

in my family,mum is supporting e family.eventhough there r 2 more person werkin,bt it feels lyke mum is e only 1 werkin..i hate living wit ppl who r nt considerate..i noe i shudnt haf sae dis bt,b grateful dat u hav a place to live.cnt u even hlp out wit e finance???
im tired n sick of this kind of life..all of u depend on mum,s if she's e one staying WITH u guys..wen mum is sick,eventhough she doesnt show,do all of u care???at this point of tyme i reallly wish dat dad is still ard..if dad is still ard,none of dis wud haf hapen.
e sight of u really makes my blood boil..bt too bad cz i'm still nt in e right to talk to u guys..how long r u guys gonna b free loader..such idiots..!!!if only i haf a job soon..

im juz worried dat my mum wud fall sick due to over werk..i really dun wanna lose another parent in my life if nt i haf no one to depend too..

i juz hope dat u will hlp out..my patience is alr at e max..i dun wish to xplode...

Labels: tired